Psycho-Babble Grief Thread 566536

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ex boyfriends suicide

Posted by Mica3 on October 13, 2005, at 17:06:05

Hi,
I'm feeling awful. we hadn't spoken for a year and I feel like this is partly my fault cos he said he couldn't live without me.
I feel so hopeless. I don't have anyone to talk to, I don't want to be a pain with my friends and I don't want to worry my family. Nobody understands. I don't make a difference to anybody. I'm single, just went back to uni (and am failing), no job, I don't own my own home, have no boyfriend, and am 30 years old. My ex and me destroyed each other but we loved each other so much. Even though I didn't want any contact with him again (at the time) I always knew he loved me and what we had was pure. I feel so bad, and so angry with myself because I wasn't more understanding.
Every day I try and think clearly. I'd got into uni, that I must do this cos it's what I want, that one day I'll meet someone nice who wants to be with me as much as I want to be with them. But I can't see any of it happening. I want him back. I can't concentrate, I want to drop out, I need a break, and I'm scared.
I need to understand why he did it.

Can anyone help?

Re: ex boyfriends suicide » Mica3

Posted by sal0805 on October 15, 2005, at 2:45:14

In reply to ex boyfriends suicide, posted by Mica3 on October 13, 2005, at 17:06:05

You are grieving and all the emotions and feelings that you are going through, although frustrating and confusing, are normal.

I understand how you might feel it is partly your fault, and these words will just sound so empty - but you are not. It was not your decision.

I wish that I could offer concrete advice or maybe even some comfort. Please consider talking to a counsellor or therapist to help you through this or to try and understand.

Kind thoughts to you
Sabrina

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